As you go through life, you meet me so many different people.
All different types of facial features, shades, heights, sizes and then some.
These people you meet along the way help you grow in more ways than one, and your fondness of them increases the more time you spend with them.
You laugh together, cry together, experience together.
But what happens when it just stops?
I know we’ve all came in contact with a fake friend at some point. And if you haven’t? Well here are some ways to spot them OR to find out if you’re the fake friend in your circle.
Fake friends can range from talking about you behind your back to not even including you in plans more than once. They can even use you without you realizing it, and still want more after you’ve already gave them everything. Or what about when they get frustrated by your presence and you haven’t even said a word yet? If they’re your friend, they should be more than happy to see you.
I do feel like we all can have tendencies to do shiest things or be selfish one way or another, but when it’s repeated behavior it has to be addressed. I’ll be the first to admit that I’ve been fake towards people, and of course I had my reasons. Sometimes you do just want distance between yourself and certain people. Other times, the reason is something more serious.
The bottom line is you want friends that make you feel important.
Loved.
Appreciated.
Not people who tear you down.
Always need a favor (nothing wrong with helping from time to time)
Or don’t support you GENUINELY when you have something good going for yourself.
If you have someone in your life displaying any of these behaviors towards you, address it! Don’t sit back while they take advantage or aren’t made aware of what they’re doing because maybe they can fix it. Be mindful that if this person was not aware of what they were doing, they also don’t know how you felt when they treated you that way. Express it wholeheartedly why you felt that way, and why you deserve better.
In that moment they will either get defensive or be understanding.
It’s your own decision on what you and the other party/parties after you put yourself out there.
If you’re the one displaying this behavior, and it’s brought to your attention. Don’t get so upset. Even if you don’t feel like you were being fake, the other person merely felt like you were and you have to explain why you were acting the way you were if there is even a particular reason at all to do so. If you don’t have a particular reason, just apologize.
If you care about this person enough as your friend, you’ll put your pride aside & make things right for the sake of the relationship. Don’t let a small miscommunication force you to throw away something special.
(Side note: It’s okay to not always be right in the situation. )
In any relationship, you want to be able to trust someone. But how do you actually develop trust?
Keeping your word when you say something is one of the main things. Along with keeping personal information sacred, not being judge mental towards one another, and just having that open line of communication to name a few.
However, the ways you can tell to not trust a person is if they constantly have to argue their perspective when you tell them something. (Sometimes it’s better to just listen, folks.) The person is also not dependable when they’re needed nor are they considerate of you and your feelings. And the list just goes on for both perspectives.
Sometimes we forget that trust and communication still apply when it comes to friendships. Those should be the first people we use those actions with if no one else.
I want to leave you with an assignment. For those of you with friends, especially close friends, tell them how much you appreciate them. How much they mean to you, and make sure to still have the conversation about trust & communication even if there’s not a problem.
Being on the same page is the best way to start a story.
Always a pleasure sharing with you, thank you.
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